missed

whereas rain had started pouring last week, and has in fact flooded several towns in central luzon, the dry spell continue to linger on my blogsite.


the words, the stories, the creativity have all been wrung dry by the petty albeit very valid concerns of my daily boring existence such as gracefully handling that memo from my bosses at the openU reminding me to take charge of my class, developing that reading list and course syllabus that i have yet to start and getting my act together to finish those two outputs for my consultancy projects. yeah, yeah the things i get myself into.


since i don't have much to say, well actually i do have a gazillion things in my head but they're not coherent at the mo. so i'll just do a pictionary of the things that I MISSED the past week.

***

josh hartnett was here and i didn't have the time to see him. grrr....

HOTNESS

my all caps, exclamation punctuated GRRRR!!!!! however, goes to that wannabe/ bi-atch named thea aquino, who was so yabang in saying that among all pinays (that includes me), she was the one chosen to "work" (that is dance naked in front of) with josh-- for that film "i come with the rain." (i still turn green when i think about it. [green with envy okay.])


i don't mind if she's stardust, it's just that, her face powder was all wrong for her color (i am being nice, it should've been her face is all wrong) and she had horrible dentures (or cap/jaket or chiklet inside her mouth).

image from bryanboy.com

you think i would give that wannabe/bi-atch the honor of being in my blogsite? NO WAY. (she got to work with josh na nga, she'll be on my blogger pa. pwede ba?)

moving on, the love of my life was also in manila last week and i missed him. AARRGH!!!!!!!!

QUENTIN TARANTINO
film maker. genius. love of my life.

he was given an award at the cinemanila 2007.
told you he's a film genius.

speaking of films. i had been looking forward to seeing the simpsons. but, let' s say this all together: I MISSED them.

i heard the family has yet to be back at their native spring field and are actually in paris.

i called uncle karl (lagerfeld) to ask if it is true, and he answered: "oui. ze simh-sohns are here in pah-ree-- soaking uhp ohn -- cuhlture. they're probably zick of being fugly ahmeree-kahns and decided to geht glam-d." i know, that sounded like yilmaz bektas, but i'm sure that was uncle karl because the following day, i got photos from him showing how the simpsons are taking over the city of pah-ree.

image from chuvaness

exhibit no.1. marc jacobs and uncle karl
showing pics of the simpsons at their fashion shows



image from chuvaness

exhibit no.2 harper bazaar's center spread


image from chuvaness

exhibit no. 3. marge with her hair down. fierce.

and finally, looks like some producers are due to squeeze out some more uncle sam dollars from movie goers by coming up with something like the movie the transformers. sources from tmz.com reported that new regency is working with the mark gordon co. to turn voltron into a live action film.

just in case you've forgotten how voltron looked like:

voltron: defender of the universe

whatevs. just make the film and let's see. (is it starting to be obvious that i am team optimus prime?)

will u wait 4 me?

when i was a little girl, i would be sitting by our porch at our house in the States and praying that someday, my knight in a shining armor would come, and he will be tall, blue-eyed and blonde haired.

eeek. that wasn't me talking.

that was my freshman blockmate and good friend, tiffany, retelling us her love story.

and well, last june 16, on the ecru shores of puerto galera, she and the tall, blue-eyed, blond haired knight exchanged "i-do's."

morten and tiffany

june 16, 2007

i love weddings. seriously, i do. no matter how simple or how modest the reception or celebration may be, it is, to me, always a grandiose display of love and faith. i have a lot of respect for couples who suck in their fears and throw out their selfishness and get married.

getting hitched is really a leap of faith. a giant leap.

take the exchanging of vows for example.

i mean, with God and so many people (or if you're a political candidate, with your entire barangay/municpality/province) as witnesses, it takes a lot, as in a loooooot of guts, sanity (or is that insanity? LOL!), maturity and courage to tell your fiance/fiancee : "I _____, take you ______, to be my wedded wife/husband. To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness or in health, to love and to cherish 'till death do us part. And hereto I pledge you my faithfulness."

celebrating one of life's many surprises

me, shella, weng and the olesens

what else? aside from the possibility of me catching the bouquet, i also like attending weddings or hearing news of friends getting married because it keeps me hopeful. i mean amidst all the prevalent destruction of families, it makes me happy that there are those who decide to build their own families.

oh gaad... this is starting to be cheesy... i'm getting nosebleed.

okay, i didn't catch the bouquet. again!!!!

but as i've said, i am hopeful. a little jaded. but still hopeful.

so hopeful that when i got back to manila, i immediately sent emails to monique luhiller, very wang and christian lacroix. and also to karl lagerfeld.

i asked them to design my wedding gown.

and...well... three weeks after, only my fairy godfather sent me a design.

the gown, my gown was worn at the chanel haute couture autumn/ winter 07-08 show.

uncle karl at the chanel haute couture atumn/winter 07-08

that's not my gown. i instructed uncle karl to use white, white, white. now... are you ready to see my gown? what? i didn't hear you? yes? okay, here goes...




*****1








**************2








****************3

will you still wait for me at the altar

if i walked down the aisle in this?

i asked fairy godfather if he was kidding and he said, he ain't.

jeeezzz.... he does have a sense of humor no?

so i asked him if the shades come with the gown.

to my delight he said: oui! oiu! oui!

at least i can hide behind the bangaw shades.

told you i am hopeful. =)

bright and shiny.

the world of pretend

with less than 48 hours before i say sayonara to UNDP's fostering democratic governance programme (and be officially added to this 3rd world archipelago's looooong list of unemployed butt wipes) i still have a coupla things left to do.

1. pack my CDs, files, books, lotions, and all the junk food that i have on my cubicle and drawers

2. compose an adieu email to the wicked and wonderful people that i've worked with in the past year (i am all giddy just thinking about this)

3. prepare for my interview with larry king, live on june 30. (6PM EST)

shameless plug

the people at CNN called me the other day and told me that good old larry chanced upon my blog and he wanted to talk to me about my sleeping disorder and how it leads to serious delusions of granduer.

off the top of my head, delusions of grandeur is not just a matter of not getting enough sleep. on my part, i think there's also not enough money, not enough time and my love is not around. (duncan sheik, 2003, yeah.)

so there, i have twenty million things to do in my soon to be ex-office today, but i got in rather late. really late. as in "my-boss-almost-kicked-my-ass" late.

and it's all because of a dude named karl.

no, not uncle karl.

i haven't spoken to him in like, eons because he has been very busy with his fall-winter 2007-2008 collection which will be available on july.

check out www.karllagerfeld.com

*****

i'm talking about karl "econometrics-is-common-sense" jandoc.what does he have to do with my being late today? a lot.

***'

at dinner yesterday, while we were being seated, karl asked the waiter to give us another chair.

"are we still expecting someone else to join us?" i asked.

"isn't anyone you know coming to join us?" karl asked back.

"ummm... none...." i answered.

"ha? wala? sigurado ka? bakit wala na naman, g.h.?" he asked.

(of course my record in the dating scene-- that is, the romantic fireworks die down even before you finish singing mary had a little lamb-- always, always prompted questions like this from my friends.)

i couldn't get pikon. the question was asked in a setting wherein karl was with his girlfriend giselle, sundy was with sarah, and i was with...umm... coach... my lovely coach bag.

so over puttanesca, pesto pasta and pizza, the five of us laughed and talked about relationships, a friend who recently got married, places we've been to and vacations that we plan to take. if my lovely bag could laugh, it would've joined us. but it just sat beside me, listening quietly.

***

when i got to my room, i just sat on my bed and thought of my friends' questions. i was trying to come up with answers, even if i was already too tired.

the digital display on my phone said it was 1:03 AM, before i slipped into lala land.

and then it happened.

***

i just came out of mango with my loot (at 50% off, the blouses were a steal) when someone called my name.

i didn't have to turn to see who it was. even in my dreams, he says my name right. (right emphasis, right pronunciation, right pause. [oh yes, my name maybe made of just two letters, but i have that thing about my name])

i did turn and he was standing in front of the lacoste shoe store. (i think we were in glorietta.)

the love of my life then started walking towards me and my shaking knees. (corny, but yeah, i think he is the love of my life. but then, i maybe wrong. but then again, whatever.)

i can only smile.

as the song goes: "the perfect words never crossed my mind cause there was nothing in there but you..."

then someone came into the picture. i have no idea who she is.

even in dreams, she was larger than life. and she had a lot of bling.

signal fire was changed to the theme of jaws.

i looked at my gummi bear with eyes saying: "please don't tell me that's your mom."

"g.h., meet my mom," he said.

the mom, who looked very chinese, she-must've-had-her-foot-binded-when-she-was-a-little-girl, smiled at me and asked if i spoke fookien.

my havaianas wanted to leave me behind and run as fast as they can.

"sorry, i'm not chinese." i answered.

but i loooove eng-bee-tin hopia, i wanted to say, but i just shut up.

the mom turned to my dude and started speaking in i don't know... mandarin, fookien, korean.... whatever, bottomline, i can't understand.

and they both started speaking to me in a language i do not know.

i walked away from them. without a word, without looking back. (oh this is so dejavu.)

***

then i woke up.

it was four o'clock in the freaking morning. i've only had three hours of sleep again. i was batting for at least five.

mother in law. geeez.... if there was anything that i dread most, other than telling my parents that they're right, i should've been a doctor instead of a dirtbag, it's meeting my boyfriend's mom--sisters--family for the first time.

on any given day, i'd rather detonate a bomb that is eight seconds away from exploding than meet my boyfriend's mom randomly for the first time.

you know this movie: Monster-in-Law, it really is an imitation of life. some moments of my life.

menopause vs. PMS

no, i do not hate the moms of my exes, in fact while i have forgotten their sons, i still remember them well.

it's just that, there's something about the mothers of the men that i dated that make me want to feign a heart attack when i'm with them, specially when they ask my all time dreaded question: "do you know how to cook?" which the sweating, fidgeting and stuttering me always answered with: "umm... no i don't. but i'm planning to learn how."

there was this line in the movie " the italian job" that got me laughing the other day. the line went: "i only know one thing in life. do not mess with mother nature, do not mess with your mother in law, do not mess with mother f**king ukranians."

he forgot to include the sister in law. oh gaad please, let's not even get into that.

***

so there, i was late for work this morning, because when i woke up at 4AM, i tried going back to sleep. it was already 7AM when i slipped back to lala land. by the time i woke up again at 8AM, my system was too upset, my head hurt like hell.

i woke up at 4AM because i had a monster in law moment in my dream. i had a monster in law moment in my dream because i was thinking of relationships before i slept. i was thinking of relationship before i slept because karl, not lagerfeld, asked me if there is anyone i know who was joining us for dinner.

there.

***

they have a term for this, i know.

not being mature.